love this lil piggy
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“(p)Orc”
“I will not lie to you. I’m a boring man who lives in a boring house in a boring suburb right in the middle of a boring state. I get up, go to my boring job every day, come back to my boring house, and go to sleep. Not a lot of excitement in this town. Not from me, not from anybody else. At least, that was until the pig came through. I don’t know what it was about that pig that upset everyone so much. Maybe it was the fact that it looked like it’d walked through 10 butcheries, which meant there was something or someone out there that clearly wanted this thing dead. Maybe it was the fact that they had, despite their best efforts, failed. The pig seemed, for all intents and purposes, fine. Sure, it looked like it’d been through hell and back, but it didn’t seem all that bothered. It just trotted through the streets, eating all the extra garbage people had left out. Maybe that’s why they didn’t like it, because it ate garbage. Or maybe it was because it brought along with it all kinds of pigs, and pigs are gross. Or maybe it was the bile it kept leaking from its own outwards innards. I’m sure the HOA didn’t like that. Personally, though, I think they didn’t like it just because that pig was the one interesting thing ever to happen to this town. They all got together, like they were gonna do something, but I don’t know what. That’s when the mayor stepped in. Said he liked the pig, that it wasn’t doing no harm, in fact it was eating all the leftover trash the collectors didn’t get to. Said it was a good thing! And nobody argues with the mayor. So the pig stayed. And things are a little more interesting. I think the mayor’s named it Wilbetta.”
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